Group Rhetorical analysis of Girl Culture

This is the link to the group outline.

Girl culture has transformed many social events, such as quinceaneras and prom, from culturally important rites of passage into commercial events where the fashion statements being made are more important to the girls participating in them than the symbolic significance of the events is. This emphasis on the material portion of these events is largely due to the increased commercial influence found in modern society. This influence causes girls to feel like they have to look a specific way in order to be accepted and appreciated, which causes them to focus on looking this way; this is a direct product of the desire to fit in and be popular that is instilled in many people during grade school. Also, to girls, these events are no longer just about passing an important point in their lives where they become women, but rather are a chance to emulate the appearance and apparel of their favorite stars.  This focus on appearance detracts from the cultural significance these events have and replaces it with the overly secularized and commercial images of these events that pop culture and commercialism have created.

In this paragraph, I focused on the purpose, subject, and tone parts of SOAPSTone. I focused on these parts because they are the parts of SOAPSTone that do the lions share convincing an audience to see an event or phenomena in the way the author wishes it to be seen. Therefore, they seemed to be the parts that I should focus on in my paragraph. In retrospect, I realize that these parts are the largest portion of any rhetorical piece, but just writing and analyzing these parts gives an incomplete picture of the rhetoric of the piece being analyzed and therefore my lack of inclusion of these other parts led to my paragraph being weaker than it otherwise would have been.

rewritten paragraph:  Girl culture has transformed many social events, such as quinceaneras and prom, from culturally important rites of passage into commercial events where the fashion statements being made are more important to the girls participating in them than the symbolic significance of the events is. This emphasis on the material aspects of events rather than culturally significant aspects of the event can be traced back to the increased impact of modern pop-culture and consumerism in American society. This is shown in the picture that depicts several young children attempting to act like their favorite pop stars. This effect continues to affect girls as they grow older, which in turn, causes events, such as prom, to be more about dressing in the latest fashions than about the cultural significance such an event holds. the pressure of modern society also cause girls to feel as if they have to look a certain way or they will be ridiculed. This pressure also makes girls more concerned about their physical appearance at these important events because they want to avoid ridicule; this detracts even further from the original meaning of these events. The significance of these events has been stripped away by commercialism present in modern society because it causes the girls involved in the events to lose sight of what the true importance of the events really is.

 

http://www.instituteartist.com/exhibition-Girl-Culture Lauren Greenfield