I commented on Davis's and Micheal's drafts
I asked one of my friends to read and analyze my draft. He said that he thought many of the ideas in the draft were good, but that my sentences were too long and sometimes hard to understand. He also recommended that I go over my word choice and make sure that that I was saying exactly what I meant.
Your essay was very well written! I loved how you emphasized how passionate Stanton is about his work! Maybe consider adding a better hook at the beginning or even a personal experience! Other than that, great job!
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